The Agony of Trilogy

In October of 2001, I was laid off from my job in the telecom industry after the events of 9/11.  I found myself newly married, living in a small condo with a lot of time and very little money.  One of four strengths that had landed me that job to begin with was my resourcefulness, so I put that characteristic to good use and discovered free entertainment from the library.  On a blustery autumn day, I climbed the stairs to the second floor of the Bear Valley Branch library, the same concrete building I frequented as a child, to discover by surprise an entire section of videos.  Somehow, it seemed unorthodox that a library promoting the enrichment and advancement of your brain would be making multimedia available.  And yet, there were movies and television series, documentaries and music videos, exercise tapes and natural birthing classes all to be viewed at your leisure.  I opted not to watch the latter and instead rented a lot of CSI: Las Vegas episodes on VHS tapes [Can you believe that just over a decade ago I was binging on entire television series using a VCR?  As a side note, I also remember that year being the last time I made a mix tape].

After I watched several seasons and could no longer tolerate the violence of that program that eventually showed up in my dreams, I moved on to reading books.  However, the violence was simply displaced from my head to my heart, as rage coursed through me when I finished the first book of a trilogy and the second was unavailable for checkout.

The first time this happened, I had just finished A Voice in the Wind, the beginning of Francine Rivers’ Mark of the Lion series.  After having been enraptured for days by historical fiction transporting me back to the Roman Colosseum, the 520-page tome ended with a cliffhanger I just couldn’t bear.  I wore down the carpet in my hallway pacing back and forth as I called nearly every used bookstore nearby begging and pleading for them to have the second book.  I remember being on my cordless phone, wondering if the battery was going to die after dialing store after store only to come up short.

While I can’t remember exactly how I commandeered the second book, I do remember feeling immense relief snuggled comfortably in my bed with several pillows propped behind my head and my down comforter pulled up to my chin while I greedily cracked the spine of An Echo in the Darkness.  Like a baby soothed by the breast, I finally felt exquisite relief.

Over the past decade, I have experienced a similar torture after finishing The Hunger Games, Tiger’s Curse, Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, and fully expect Divergent to be the next.  It feels like cruelty to be left with the traumatic events of only part of a story without having full knowledge of how it will ultimately end.  And yet, I think the authorial intent is for you to experience that agonizing pain so acutely that only the hope of relief drives you to keep reading until the very end.

Today is Good Friday.  There is seemingly nothing “good” about a day commemorating the judgment, betrayal, loss, abandonment, torture and death of our beloved savior.  English is actually the only language that uses the word “good.”  The term “holy” is used in the romantic languages; German uses the word for “sorrowful” or “suffering.”  In Denmark, today is known as “Long Friday.”  It seems to be unclear how this day got translated into English as “Good” Friday.

However, today ends the first book of an epic trilogy.  I think about the narrative of this day 2,000 years ago and it is a cliffhanger I can hardly tolerate.  I squirm in sitting with the drama of Jesus taking on punishment by the will of his Father.  My stomach is pitted by the passion of the cross.  Even as I type these words, there is a lump in my throat.  I want the agony to end.  And yet, I must live with this day.  I must feel this exquisite anguish in order that the hope of relief will drive me to endure the rest of this Good Friday as well as Holy Saturday all while anticipating the resurrection on Sunday.  Thankfully, I know how this trilogy ends.  But still, I am forced to remain in this day.  To be stuck with the ending of this book, painfully unable to acquire the next.  It certainly doesn’t feel “good.”  But would I even consider reading a trilogy that did anything less?


Sunday Specials

*Sunday Specials are a weekly round-up of happenings on the web-o-sphere. So enjoy your coffee while checking out what’s caught our attention. 

2014 International Day of Happiness

Did everyone realize that the 2nd Annual International Day of Happiness was this past week?! The Gauthier household started the day with the infectious Happy song by Pharrell busting through our speakers. How can anyone resist the urge to dance while listening to that song? I dare you to try. Or better yet, go watch the first ever 24 hour music video.

Speak Fear, Praying Shalom by Osheta Moore

Osheta Moore’s honest reflections on both her fear and her desire for a shalom that irradicates the US and THEM dichotomy is incredibly moving.

So I write my friends with blogs and I confess that as a black mama with Stand Your Ground Laws picking off our children one by one—I’m terrified of ‘them’. I invite them to write prayers as we stand together for God’s wholeness in the brokenness the justice system. We are white women and black, American and Canadian, young and old, urban and suburban and my fear will no longer perpetuate ‘us’ and ‘them’. ~Osheta Moore

She references the poem below in her post so I thought I’d share it here as well.

Why I Love Thursday Nights by Shauna Niequist

I recently read Bread and Wine: A Love Letter to Life Around the Table with Recipes by Shauna Niequist. It was perfect bathtime reading material that catered to my love for food and desire for community. This post on her blog gives you just a taste of her appreciation for what happens around the table.

As the months go by, as we build this little tribe week by week, hour by hour around the table, I find myself bubbling with joy in anticipation of Thursday evenings. I love planning the recipes, prepping the food. I set the table in the afternoon, and I pray by name for each person that will gather around our table later that night. I’m rarely “in charge” of the discussion or study that happens after dinner, but the table is my contribution, and it’s one that I love. ~Shauna Niequist

A Few Thought Provoking Posts on the Passing of Fred Phelps:

Fred Phelps is Dead and I’m Grateful by Emily Timbol
Fred Phelps’ Death Isn’t a Cause for Celebration by Brandon W. Peach

Soul Pancake

I love Soul Pancake (producers of Kid President) and a video they posted this week fits nicely in with our pondering upon wholeness vs. perfectionism.



I know I’m a little late to the game here…but I just started reading Divergent by Veronica Roth. My hope is to finish it quickly so I can see the movie while it’s still in theaters. Not surprisingly, it was number one at the box office this past week. I’ll do my own book review and subsequent movie review in the coming weeks!


What’s Happening in Russia?

I try to keep up with world news in an effort to hold in my mind the reality that I am a part of a larger narrative and moment in time. Slate has been generating some interesting articles related to what is currently going on Russia:
Crimea is Putin’s Revenge by Masha Gessen
Russia Will Never Be Like Us by Anne Applebaum

What captured your attention around the web-o-sphere this week?